Whom should you befriend?

Whom should you befriend?

Dancers often make mistakes, and female dancers especially. They make friends as if they were normal people, not dancers. They befriend people they like - people they can talk to, joke with, and so on. And so it happens that girls usually hang out with girls. That’s all nice, they text each other, plan their outfits, borrow scarves and dresses to one another… It’s idyllic, really. Until the time to register for a festival comes, and the panic sets in. Early bird registrations are usually open to couples only, and these BFFs have no one to sign up with. So they hunt down leaders all over Facebook.

Ha! Maybe you should’ve thought of that before, for example when you decided to ignore that creepy guy, or that pervert, or that weirdo that seemed as if he would slaughter you on the dance floor and eat your liver before the song ends. I’m joking. Guys are mostly normal. Some are lacking in confidence or company in the beginning, especially if they’ve come to the class without anyone; they give up easily if they don’t turn out to be the best dancer in the world during the first two weeks or if they don’t make friends with anyone.

You need guys - you need them to dance with you at parties, and to sign up with you for festivals and workshops. So talk your friend, brother or ex into going to classes with you. Convince them that dancing is great! After all, many dance schools (not just those that teach the Lindy Hop) only let couples apply.

And now is the time for our pseudo-sociology minute! Girls like spending time with other girls because guys are mostly stupid. Guys always want to spend time with girls because they believe that that could lead to having sex by accident (yes, guys really do believe that you can have sex by accident). On the other hand, guys always have a latent fear of homosexuality, so they won’t hang out with other guys eagerly. They’ll only hang out if they have to, which means if there are no girls, and they’ll try not to spend too much time together. Only the mature guys are capable of having man-ships (man friendships) and being relaxed while hanging out with other guys. Although it often happens that these guys become too relaxed and they develop an obvious man crush.

So, the conclusion is: you don’t have to pretend or calculate, but at least keep in mind that it would be nice to talk to that shy guy in the corner every now and then. Not to sign up for festivals with him, but because such guys are usually interesting. I mean, you can’t say that serial killers aren’t interesting.


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